Vulnerability

Sometimes I worry that I take relationships too seriously. I've always worried that the man I am dating does not take me as seriously as I take him. I focus on the present, I try my best to not think about the past [though that's hard not to do] and I do my best to respect and honor the man that I am dating. As co dependant as that may seem, it's my stance, I want to treat my man the way that I would like to be treated. What comes of this however is an imbalance where I feel as though it could all end in a single second because I don't hold up any arms. It's almost like you let your guard down and then you get hit. Sometimes I worry that I worry [how good is that?]. I want to be secure and I feel insecure, I can deal with the ups and downs, it's just that sometimes I need my man to let me know that "were" okay. I just worry thats all, because I'm always waiting for the shit to hit the fan and take away my happiness. It's an ugly standpoint but I'm so settled on the idea that nothing good ever lasts forever. Believe that it's the nature of this life; only the strong of will make it to the very end to visualize the prize. So I'll see what's to come and as long as he wants me and I want him ... I think we'll be okay.