I Hate You.

Dear Aaron,

I've never told you this before but - I don't like you much. I find you to be a completely disgusting being; one who lives a disgustingly immoral life. No it's not your homosexuality - but rather your abuse of it which makes me cringe. I can't date a single motherfucker in town without fearing you've slept with them. And yes I know of the STD's you hold. And I thank God that I never let you fuck me with that skank dick.

You make me angry - I never closed the book. I should have told you like I saw it last August. I should have smacked you in the face when you fucked me over. I should have let you die when you needed a friend. I am not your friend, I in fact despise you. I hate to feel as though you are my competition, and that you'd fuck my potentials in a split second before I had the chance to show them I care. I hate that you live in the same town as I do, I hate that you're alive, I hate that you're in my mind. I want you dead, I want you to go away. I want the memories of you and I to be gone. You are a great regret and yet somehow I come back to you with fake smiles and empty moments. You're still around and this is why I must tell you ....... I hate you for everything that you are, every fear that you enstilled in me and every sense of distrust that I will ever feel in present relationships with others. So please just die because I'm shaking inside. I hate the memories. I hate you I hate you I hate you I hate you I hate you.

(With that said...... here is a partial transcript of our final conversation just had)

The Faerie Godfather says:
At that time, I had a lot of experience in dating and fucking around. You: very little. I could tell that with what little we had done together, you imagined we were closer, more intimate...more tied together than we really were...
The Faerie Godfather says:
or at least what I felt we were.
The Faerie Godfather says:
*nods* Which is why I didn't pursue things. Also the reason I didn't have sex with you *shrugs*
Shadowon7heWaLL says:
brb customer.
The Faerie Godfather says:
K.
Shadowon7heWaLL says:
Ok I'm back.
The Faerie Godfather says:
Shadowon7heWaLL says:
Basicly. I just need to let you know my resentment toward you. So that I can move on. I dont want to carry this "friendship" out past that. I should have ended this a long time ago Aaron. But I allowed you to remain around for sake of needing to feel special to someone. But when you're kissin me and sleepin with the next three other guys -- you really taught me a lesson; of what is ugly.
The Faerie Godfather says:
Hmmm...yeah. I understand. I felt similarly, actually. Tolerating your eccentricities somewhat out of obligation. And then, later, your little arrogant nuances. It all comes to bear in the end.
The Faerie Godfather says:
If anything, I hope you've learned to assume less and think more.
The Faerie Godfather says:
Keep in mind though, you were quite willing.
The Faerie Godfather says:
I did not force you into anything you didn't accept.

Shadowon7heWaLL says:
No but you failed to let me know where it stood. This is not all your fault.
Shadowon7heWaLL says:
I accpet my waekness in this.
The Faerie Godfather says:
And lastly, I was not sleeping with three other men. I merely moved on to someone who seemed more compatable.
Shadowon7heWaLL says:
But I do not apologize for who I am.
The Faerie Godfather says:
Oh, I never asked you to.
The Faerie Godfather says:
I do make it a point to talk about where things are and where they are going. If I avoid the topic... it usually means they are going nowhere.
The Faerie Godfather says:
But, of course...you didn;t know that.
Shadowon7heWaLL says:
Listen up. Its been a year ok. We were never anything. I just had to let you know how I felt a year on. I needed to express this so that I could move on.
The Faerie Godfather says:
Good
Shadowon7heWaLL says:
I want us to no longer communicate.
The Faerie Godfather says:
I should imagine you had moved on long ago. Surprised you kept this bound up inside. Seems like you'd have better things to do with your life.
The Faerie Godfather says:
Toodles
Shadowon7heWaLL says:
Goodbye Aaron.
The Faerie Godfather says:
Ciaooooooooo.