Something is wrong with me this afternoon, I've gone from feeling content; to feeling like I am about to slip into a depression. And depression is something that I don't have any time for right now. I'm simply too focused on ... someody that I'm getting closer to ... and I don't know if I should be. I'm starting to fall, and it's something that I'm questioning. Am I ready, am I in a place right now where I should just surrender and enter a relationship?. I mean .... we're already in an untitled relationship, and I'm not sure if I want to title what it is that we are to each other right now. I like him, and I love his smile and the way I feel when we look into each other's eyes, and the way my body feels when he touches me, I just feel really good, it's like a high.
I don't know if it's this confusion, or if it's my job that is making me feel really .... oppressed. I can litterally feel my body held down like a black cloud has come over me and it's really an evil place. I hate it I havent felt this way since I met .. him. And something is odd today, something has come inside of me and shaken my happiness. It has disturbed all that was content for once and it has left me feeling like I'm sick and alone .... something is different, I feel scared. What the hell is this shit, I need to take control again and move on from this idea that something is wrong. But the truth is that I've got a co-worker who's just finished giving me attitude up the yin yang and now she's talking my head off and trying to look at my entry as I'm writing it. I'm so sick of people acting like baboons. I don't live in a zoo, the zoo is meant for animals. I feel really intense ...
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